


Two Sides of Magic

by Trexi



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Era, Episode: s03e10 Queen of Hearts, Gen, Magic Reveal, Post-Episode: s03e08 The Eye of the Phoenix, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-05-28 17:23:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15054125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trexi/pseuds/Trexi
Summary: Gwen goes to Merlin about seeing Morgana’s magic and walks in on him conjuring flowers in his room, frustrated that they’re not strawberries.





	1. Strawberries

Morgana has magic. She was using it against Arthur. Is this what she was really doing in that year away from Camelot? Was she with Morgause the whole time? Is that why she came back so different, so cold? I’ve got to tell somebody about her. Not Arthur, he won’t be believe me and I can’t test just how far his trust in me goes right now. Maybe I could tell Gaius, but no, he’d tell the King. Merlin, then. I just have to convince him not to go to Arthur and we can handle this together.

This time of the day, he’s usually helping Gaius. I could tell him we need to talk about something important and we could go to pick herbs or something. That could work. Nobody would suspect a thing. Morgana wouldn’t suspect a thing. It was hard enough serving her this morning and acting like everything was the same. I could use Merlin’s help. He manages to hide things from Arthur all the time.

The Physician’s Chambers are empty. Gaius’ medical bag is missing. They’re probably out attending someone in town. Something falls over in Merlin’s room. Perfect. We won’t need to leave to talk.

“Still not strawberries!” Merlin shouts.

I smile. He sounds so frustrated. I shift his door open a little. My smile drops. Merlin’s eyes are glowing gold and his room is covered in red roses, tulips, carnations, every red flower I’ve ever thought could be red and some that definitely aren’t naturally that colour. He closes his hands together and mutters an incantation. His eyes flash gold and more roses appear. Merlin groans and throws himself onto his bed. He stares at all the flowers blooming in his room. Then he notices me.

“Gwen?” Merlin’s face drains of colour as he slowly sits up. “Please.” I’ve never heard him sound so desperate. “Please don’t tell him. I promise I’ve never used it against him or you or Camelot. I just-.” Merlin brakes off, shaking violently.

If Morgana saw me, she’d probably be threatening me by now.

I make sure the door to the physician’s chambers is closed. Good. Nobody else saw then. I step into Merlin’s room and gently close the door behind me. “How long?”

“I was born with it. Mother said I was moving things around before I could even speak.”

So he’s been a sorcerer since before Camelot. And he still confessed to it to save me after only weeks of knowing me. Merlin saved my father. I knew he was acting suspicious back then. He’s still been knowingly breaking the law for years.

“I’ve seen magic do so much harm,” I start, wincing as Merlin flinches. “Morgana, she has let magic twist her into someone I can’t recognise.”

“You know about her magic?” he asks.

“And you did too, didn’t you?”

Merlin drops his head. “I keep thinking that if I told her about me then I could’ve stopped Morgause from changing her. It’s my fault she’s like this now.”

“So you didn’t teach her?”

He scoffs. “I haven’t taught anyone magic. I was rubbish at spells before I got here. My magic is different from everyone else’s. It’s instinctual, like breathing.” Merlin manages a tiny smile. “Yet I can’t even manage a single strawberry.”

I relax a little. “Why strawberries?”

Merlin scoots up his bed and lets me sit down. I do so slowly.

“There was this druid girl, Freya.” He smiles. “She was cursed and a bounty hunter brought her to Camelot. She was terrified, so I helped her escape and hid her. I couldn’t just leave her locked up in a cage when that could’ve been me.” He pauses and I feel myself relax more. This is Merlin. Magic or not, he can’t be evil. Not him too. “I smuggled her some of Arthur’s food. It’s not like he was going to really miss it. Freya was so grateful and I asked her what food she would want, if she could have any.”

“And she said strawberries?” I ask.

Merlin nods. “Trouble was, when I tried to conjure some, I made a rose instead.” His smile drops completely and that spark in his eyes dies. Merlin looks around at the flowers and I keep my mouth closed. If he wants to continue, he will. Eventually he sighs and looks up at me, head bowed. “I was going to run away with her. I was going to leave Camelot, leave my life, my friends, my des-. I was going to leave my destiny, protecting Arthur. And like always, whenever I find someone that makes me truly happy, destiny decided otherwise.”

I squeeze Merlin’s hand. “What happened to Freya?”

“She was cursed to transform into a bastet at night and kill. The night we were going to run away, she-. Well, my destiny killed her.”

“Arthur.”

He nods. “He didn’t know how I felt about her. I’m sure if he did, then he wouldn’t have...” Merlin fixes me with a hard stare. “He wouldn’t have, right?”

I don’t know. “Of course not,” I manage to say.

“Freya, I found her while she was transformed and she didn’t attack me. She recognised me, but it was too late. I took her to a lake with mountains nearby, where we were planning to spend our life together, and she died in my arms. She’s the fourth person I’ve cared about who has laid dying in my arms. First was Will and third my father, just days after I met the man.”

I hate to ask. “And the second?”

“Morgana, after I poisoned her to save Camelot from Morgause’s sleeping curse. That’s why she’s been betraying us, because I betrayed her first.” I must visibly flinch because he moves away from me. “She was the focus of the curse and wanted Uther dead. I don’t know if she knew that Morgause was willing to kill anyone who got in her way, Arthur included, but it was her or Camelot. I had to choose.”

“Is that why you haven’t told anyone about her magic? About how she tried to kill Arthur during his quest to the Perilous Lands?”

“Ah, that’s when you saw her use magic,” he mutters to himself. “That’s not the only reason. Aside from the fact that neither Uther nor Arthur would believe me, it would shatter both of them and could turn Arthur away from magic forever. And I can’t let that happen. I can’t know that I will never be able to truly be myself around him. It’s hard enough now, knowing that someday he’ll know what I’ve done for him, someday he’ll accept me.”

“I could tell him. He might take it better from me.”

Merlin relaxes at my tone. “You could.” His eyes flash gold and the flowers disappear. “Just don’t tell him about all of this. He teases me enough as it is.”

“But-.” I push back years of being told otherwise. “Your magic is different from hers. It’s ... well, it’s beautiful. It’s lightness and flowers and...” I smile and pluck it from his hair, holding it out to him. “And strawberries.”

Merlin grins. “I did it!”

“I don’t want to keep this a secret from Arthur, but I don’t want you to be exiled or...”

“Executed?”

“He wouldn’t kill you, Merlin. You’re his best friend.”

Merlin stares at the strawberry. “But I don’t want him to choose between me and his father. I can’t put him in that position.” He lets out a choked laugh. “But more than anything, I want to tell him. I want him to react the same way you have. I want him to keep trusting me.” Merlin looks at me. “You do still trust me, right? I haven’t lost your friendship?”

When I first saw those golden eyes, the same ones Morgana had that drove me to seek help from Merlin, I might’ve said yes. But he’s not suddenly twisted and different from the man he was before, even if he was keeping something so big a secret. He was trying to conjure a strawberry for goodness sake and filled his room with flowers instead. That isn’t evil.

“You’ll always have my friendship.”

Merlin’s smile is somehow brighter than his golden eyes as flowers appear and thread themselves through my hair. I shake my head in disbelief at my friend. I’ll make Arthur see it. There are two sides to magic and Merlin is so obviously the light.


	2. Loyalty

Arthur escorts an old man past my cell, a very familiar old man. No. He can’t have meant this. Not again. I listen silently as Arthur interrogates the man and cringe at how obviously Merlin-like he’s acting. It’s a wonder Arthur doesn’t catch on. Eventually the prince gets tired of Merlin’s rambling and comes to my cell.

He smiles wearily at me. “Sorry for all this trouble, Guinevere. We’ve got the real culprit now so you can finally get out of here.”

I stand back as he unlocks the cell door and swings it open. Arthur pulls me into a quick hug, before glancing around the empty dungeons and kissing my cheek.

“There’s something else wrong, isn’t there?” I ask. “You seem tired.”

“Guess that’s what happens when your manservant disappears in the middle of a crisis. I’ve no clue where the idiot has gone off to this time. Gaius refuses to tell me whether it’s the tavern again or not. Frankly I thought he’d be a better friend to you and constantly pestering me about this mess, but nothing. He didn’t even show up to come down here with me to release you. I’m truly sorry, Guinevere, I swear I’ll make him see sense before the day is out. I’ll hunt him down if I have to.”

Arthur turns to leave. I glance back at the other cell and sigh. Sorry Merlin, but I have to do this.

“Arthur, wait,” I say.

The old man lifts his head, those all-too-familiar blue eyes lighting up. How could Arthur not recognise his friend sitting there?

I stride up to Merlin’s cell and crouch down. “Is it just an illusion or…?”

Merlin smiles weakly. “I don’t think I’m meant to feel my bones creak if it was.”

“Guinevere, you know this man?”

I nod. “He’s in disguise.”

Merlin laughs at that.

Arthur steps closer. “He was the one who did this to you, who left the poultice.”

“No, Arthur, he was the one who saved me from the pyre again. Always has to claim to be the sorcerer in my place.”

“Always? But you’ve only been accused of sorcery once before. And the person who…” Arthur’s eyes widen. He studies the old man who stares back with a familiar smile. “Merlin?”

“Prince Prat.”

“You… You’re…”

Merlin grins. “I think I broke him,” he mock-whispers to me.

I stand up and get Arthur to look at me. “He’s still him. He’s not evil or corrupt or anything like that. I promise you, Arthur. He’s still Merlin, just with a little-.”

Merlin clears his throat.

“Okay, a lot of magic.”

Arthur recoils. “How long have you known?”

“A few weeks. I kind of walked in on him trying to conjure a strawberry and filling his room with hundreds of red flowers instead.”

“Gwen! I told you not to tell him that part.” Merlin folds his arm, looking more like his young self than an eighty-year-old.

I ignore him. “See what I mean? Still Merlin.”

“But I don’t understand,” Arthur says quietly, looking at Merlin again. “If you’ve got ‘a lot’ of magic why do you still look like that?”

Merlin stares at his feet and mumbles something.

“What was that?” Arthur asks.

“I can’t get the de-aging spell to work.”

“You can’t get the de-aging spell to work,” Arthur repeats, a grin slowly forming.

“It’s the first time I’ve done something like this, okay! I was kind of rushing for Gwen’s sake. I didn’t realise it’d be more difficult to use magic when I’m like this.”

Arthur finally relaxes. “Your beard is ridiculous.”

“It tricked you well enough.”

“What, like the name Dragoon? Where’d you pull that one from?”

“I made it up on the spot.”

“You mean you didn’t prepare a name beforehand? What’d you think was going to happen, we’d just refer to you as that old sorcerer?”

“It’s not like you’ve ever cared about magic-user’s names before. They burn all the same.”

Arthur flinches, and seems to remember where we are. “How are we going to get you out of this one, Merlin?”

“You want to help me, even with my magic?”

I frown. “You’re our friend, Merlin. We’re not going to let you get killed for something you had no choice in.”

“No choice in?” Arthur frowns. “But everyone has a-.”

“I was born with my magic, Arthur. And don’t tell me to just stop using it. Last time I did that, I was bedridden for a month. It’s like telling someone to stop eating or breathing.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Look at where I am. If your father knew who I really was, he’d still burn me. I know how much you don’t want to disappoint the man. It’s hardly fair of me to ask you to keep this a secret from him.”

“You’re right, but it’s hardly fair of me to not protect the idiot who keeps trying to sacrifice himself for his friends.” Arthur smiles. “How exactly were you going to get yourself out of this without my help?”

Merlin shrugs. “I would’ve figured something out. I always do in these situations.”

“You get in them a lot then?”

“At least I’m not as bad as you, _sire._ I swear you attract assassins, bandits, and angry sorcerers on a weekly basis. It’s tiring business keeping you alive.”          

“You’re serious?” Arthur turns to me. “He’s serious?”

“From what I’ve heard so far, yes.”

Merlin frowns. “Your father hired me for saving your life, Arthur. I take my job very seriously.”

“You do realise that being my manservant doesn’t mean being my protector, right?”

I raise an eyebrow. “It also doesn’t mean stable hand or squire or advisor, but you’ve had Merlin doing the duties of all three since the start.”

“Wait a minute.” Merlin stumbles to his feet. “You mean to tell me that I’m not meant to muck out the stables?”

“It builds character,” Arthur says.

Merlin scowls and mutters something under his breath. His eyes flash gold but nothing happens.

“What were you trying to do?” I ask.

“Get rid of these damn wrinkles so I can force myself out of this cell and punch the royal prat that I risked the pyre for to stop him from throwing away his right to the throne.”

Arthur frowns. “Why do you care so much about me becoming King? My father slaughtered your kind. I’ve hunted sorcerers down without questioning it, without considering that they might just be clumsy idiots like you. What could I have possibly done to warrant such loyalty from you when you should despise me?”

“I’ve seen the makings of a great, true King in you Arthur, in between your prattish moments. Your people love you and you truly care for them. You don’t think of what they could do for you, you worry over whether you’re doing enough for them.” Merlin starts fidgeting with his hands. “And frankly, I’d do anything to stop the next-in-line from getting on the throne. Where you would inspire hope, she would inspire hate.”

“But there is no other heir.”

Merlin lowers his eyes. “You are not Uther’s only child. You’ve got a half-sister who craves the throne and all it represents. She was the one who planted the original poultice, trying to undermine you in your father’s eyes.”

Morgana. Merlin told me about what she’d done when I was first thrown down here. To think, there was a day I would’ve delighted in the idea of her having a right to the throne. Now, now I’m just not sure about anything when it comes to her anymore. She’s been different ever since she got back. I’m not sure I recognise my friend in that woman.

“Who is it?” Arthur asks.

“I don’t think you want to know,” I say quietly.

He turns to me. “You’ve known about this too?”

“No, I only know who set us up. Merlin never told me about this before.”

“That seems to be a pattern, doesn’t it? Merlin, secret-keeper of Camelot.”

“I didn’t want to know this, Arthur! There are a lot of things that I find out, things that I’m told about the past and the future that I have to keep secret. Things like my magic, the real reason the Purge started, and the unnamed Princess of Camelot. She’s already treated like one, yet Morguase has made her crave more power.”

“Who on Earth is already treated like a…? No. You’re lying. Father was right. Sorcerers are liars. All of them. You can’t mean her. She’s not really my sister. I would know.”

Merlin sighs. “Just like you’d know if your manservant had magic? She has it too. It started with her nightmares. She’s a seer and a witch.”

Arthur backs away. “No. You’re wrong. You’re just trying to turn me against her and my father. You’re trying to manipulate me.”

I reach for his arm. Arthur snatches it away.

“Arthur,” I say softly. “I saw Morgana use magic myself. She was enchanting some sort of straw doll and it caught on fire. I knew without a doubt that it was dark magic. It was like I could feel the evil rolling off it.”

“It was the reason you were feeling fatigued in your quest through the Perilous Lands. She’d given you a phoenix eye in that bracelet,” Merlin adds.

Arthur shakes his head.

I take a step towards him. “That’s when I found out about Merlin. I was scared of Morgana so I went to him for help.”

“Why didn’t you come to me?” Arthur asks, his voice like a knife to my heart.

“Because I couldn’t be sure that you’d believe me.”

Arthur turns to Merlin. “And you? Why didn’t you tell me whenever you found out?”

“I was the first person Morgana told about her magic. Remember that fire and smashed window? Those were the first signs of her magic developing. Morgana was terrified when she told me and I... I promised to keep it a secret but I didn’t tell her about mine. I didn’t tell her that she wasn’t alone. It’s my fault she sort comfort in her half-sister, in Morgause. Don’t make that face, Arthur. They share a mother. You don’t suddenly have two sisters.”

“I don’t suddenly have a sister at all!” Arthur runs his hands through his hair and stalks away. He shakes his head and sighs, walking back to us. “She’s always been a sister to me, right from the start. I just wish that she knew, that you all knew, that you can come to me with these kinds of things. How am I meant to be a good king when I can’t help my friends when they’re terrified? What kind of person can’t even tell when the people closest to them are going through their day, scared that the next time they see me, I’ll be with two guards ready to drag them to the pyre?”

“You’re the kind of person who has been deceived for too long,” I answer. “Which is why I don’t think there should be any of these kinds of secrets between us all. I know that might be harder for some than others.”

Merlin shifts awkwardly.

“But friends deserve the truth from each other,” I finish.

Arthur nods. “Now, let’s get this idiot free.”

“Perhaps I can help with that.” We turn to see Gaius, watching us with a raised eyebrow. ”Unless, of course, you three have it handled?”

The boys avoid Gaius’ eye.

I sigh. “We’d be very grateful for your help.”

Honestly, what would these two do without me?

“I thought as much. Well, Gwen I could use your assistance preparing the potion to undo Merlin’s ridiculous spell and Arthur, I believe your father would want some convincing proof from you that you’re no longer under any sort of enchantment. It wouldn’t do well for _Dragoon_ to disappear and you to suddenly be free from it.”

“What about me?” Merlin asks.

Gaius smiles. “You can wait here and reflect on using a spell that you don’t know how to reverse.” Gaius turns around. “No time for sitting around and chatting. We’ve got an idiot to save from the pyre.”

It’s about time we repay some of Merlin’s never ending loyalty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was definitely a moment where I wished Arthur/Gwen knew what Merlin did for them. Taking Gwen's place on the pyre, albeit with every intention to get out of it, is still seriously impressive for Merlin who must've had nightmares of being sent to it since arriving in Camelot.

**Author's Note:**

> Because Merlin needs more friends knowing about his magic.
> 
> 20/07/2018: Figured out the perfect way to continue this for those who wanted more than a one-shot. Follow up chapter will be up in 2-3 days.


End file.
